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Light a spark

harrisonsaito6

We are all connected.


I've recently been reflecting on my coaching on students, particularly those who start martial arts or academic tuition early on. Some as young as 3 or 4 years old, begin martial arts, alongside those who range from 6 years of age through to teens to even grown adults. Incredibly, some of these young 3 or 4 year olds have kept up with the intensity of a group class and interestingly have outperformed those double their age. The metric of their performance here is even without adjusting judgement for the age, size and maturity differences. Speaking to such childrens' parents, their core value they try to impart is a positive, never-giving up attitude.


On the flip side, I've seen children who excelled in their commitments all the way through from start (for example, 6 years old) through to their mid teens. Most of these students burnt out and I could see in hindsight, over the years their determination and subsequently their output dwindled. The big question for me to consider was "Why?" When parents come to me for the first time, with their child's best interest at heart, they tell me they want their children to be more active, to be more disciplined, to focus more, to keep them out of trouble etc. I try to ask them what the child perceives in this potential commitment. The importance I've noted for long term sustainability is that the child sees value in this commitment. At times, the value may be for the wrong reasons. The teens may see martial arts as a way to look fitter, to outperform their peers at school in sport, to win competitions or fights. This is often where the delicate balance may fall out of alignment but that may be the natural course of where they must go. It's all part of the experience.


I endeavour to guide them to see the inverse in all things. With rapport at the forefront, I aim to plant a seed within them so that they may be reminded at some point in the future. We were all children once; young, naive and full of impunity. Arguably, we all still largely embody such traits and that is the beauty of humanity. Noone is perfect and noone ever will be. A symbiosis of healing and growth!


Looking back, I've tried to theorise and think too much to the point where I rushed to seek answers. If I make things more efficient, if I speed up or focus more intensely, perhaps the answer will come! As I mature more and am humbled by life, my values and core beliefs begin to simplify. We are all trying our best in our own perception of our capacity, in alignment with our upbringing and core experiences. As first mentioned, we are all connected. Humans are collective creatures and we are not meant to be alone for a long period of time. Let's not be so engrossed in our own problems to the point where we may feel inferior or superior to another. Light a small spark of goodness to where ever we may be or going. Smile at a stranger if you meet eyes. Give way more on the road. It starts from within yourself. Whatever you're holding onto tightly, loosen your grip more. Laugh. Hurry slowly. But don't be too hard on yourself when your beliefs, goals and strategies don't work immediately or over a long time. Forgiveness, understanding of impermanence, a conscious erosion of the ego and incremental progression; I believe these are simple yet so difficult steps towards inner peace.

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